Promundo Institute
We are not going to evaluate the intentions or the way in which a broadcaster allows and takes advantage of humiliating facts to generate more profits. Not even if the images are in fact clear in demonstrating that the young woman was unconscious – although it seems evident to us, mainly due to the girl's surprised reaction. But it is difficult to remain silent when a number of people refuse to recognize that a situation in which someone insists on having sex with another who is unconscious is sexual violence.
Perhaps the boy didn't even realize that continuing sexual intercourse while the girl was unconscious was violence. It is very likely that he imagined that the scene would reveal how manly he can be, or that he could be successful by being the first “catcher” in the house. Perhaps she, although appalled by what happened to her, is not even aware that she was disrespected. In this episode, it doesn't seem like it's about post-alcoholic regret. It's exactly about something happening to her body, which she didn't know about, didn't decide on, or consent to.
It is precisely this point that we would like to highlight: men do not realize that they are disrespecting women, nor do women realize that they are being disrespected. And this is exactly what makes machismo so effective. We assume such marked roles and we think that this is part of the nature of men and women: “men are not able to control their sexual appetite and women provoke these appetites”. Such stereotypes are unfair and cruel to women. And with men, who need to prove that they are fierce and predatory all the time.
Silences are, sometimes, the most revealing aspects of the effectiveness of machismo. The underrepresentation of reports of rape and sexual violence has been a pattern for decades. However, recent studies have revealed a terrifying reality: in 2010, 10 women were raped per day in the state of Rio de Janeiro, corresponding to a 25% increase in reports from 2009. And the crime of threats increased by 6 %. The aggressor, in most cases, knows the victim and lives or lived with her.
Promundo is in favor of challenging and transforming stereotypes that make everyone lose out. We advocate that women and men can have sexual relations to the extent they wish, in a way that is consensual for both. And consent comes from speech and not from silence, especially if this silence is not intentional, but the result of a state of unconsciousness. Men have the right to be stimulated and not be in the mood for sex. Women have the right to be naked and also to be stimulated and not want to go all the way in sexual intercourse. And they must be respected for this!
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